The more I am here, the more I don't want to leave. I just don't. I remember how I wrote here only about how I was scared of coming here - and now I am scared of leaving. I just realised that I might never see these people - my friends - again in my life. It's very very hard to deal with something like that.
I lost all my data today and recovered it. The relief was really something. But then a stray comment made me realise - why was I so keen to recover it? It's almost over. Every day I hear the same thing - it's almost over. And to me, that's not a relief. That makes me afraid and pained and unhappy and depressed - that it's almost over. I won't see the sun rise over the valley any more. I won't have meals with friends any more - no more hanging out, no more sitting and talking and laughing and making crazy plans. There's no time for crazy plans any more.
I've said it before and I will say it again. I will miss this place. I will miss these people. I will miss some of the best friends I have ever made in my life. I can't write any more.
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